Back on December 15th after awakening at my usual 2 a.m.-ish time, I found an email on my phone from the New York Times (they are trying to recruit me as a subscriber), as I do about a dozen times a day. The first story they shared before all the popups thwarted my attempt to read more, was the sad story of the brutal murder of actor/director Rob Reiner and his wife.

After I read what I could before cursing the popups, I’d read a few of the comments that followed the story. One of the first ones was a remark calling Reiner a brutal liberal Democrat who should have just kept his mouth shut. A few comments I could read after that one and before the story was blocked (in a teasing attempt of the NYT to sign me up as a subscriber), there were some other derogatory comments, regarding Reiner’s advocacies, political affiliation, and his support and philanthropic interests and fundraising projects.

My cussing the popups immediately stopped as my anger turned to the questions atop this narrative today. When will it ever stop, (or won’t it?) A man and his wife were brutally murdered, in what has become a tragic and all too regular trend in our country. It seems, before some people think first about the lives of the people, in many cases innocent children, being snuffed out by senseless violence, brutal gunfire, and/or stabbing, their hatred and intolerance of others and their opinions and personal beliefs sounding snide, cruel, and mean, are spewed throughout social media. It’s too bad some forget, when someone they liked or supported were victims of a violent crime, their reactions were of anger, vengeance, and cries for immediate punishment.

Why does it seem like whenever wants to share their opinion, someone who disagrees with their comment has to turn to mudslinging, immature, childish, blame and political banter before realizing that in many of the things they are commenting on were situations resulting in the senseless killing of one, two, or many innocent people? NO ONE deserves to be brutally killed for any reason, but it’s amplified a million times when it’s senseless. Children on playgrounds DO NOT deserve to die from gunfire. There are too many children battling cancer and other diseases, or accidents, that cut their lives short. The same goes for children in classrooms, Sunday School classes, and people of any and all ages, in restaurants, post offices, churches, shopping places, sports arenas, or in situations caused by road rage, or anything else. All senseless deaths should never be looked at crudely, disrespectfully, or distastefully.

Before thinking of the perpetrator’s or victim’s political affiliation, or fabricating their motive for doing it, or reason or justification for receiving it, let’s remember the victims were people who deserved to live and if they committed a crime, even one so severe it could be harshly punishable by law, someone with a gun or a knife has no right to be judge, jury, and/or executioner, and no one convicted by the system of justice created and constitutionalized by our forefathers, and written in the Constitution of our United States, should be excused from following the law, and suffering the consequences if the law has been broken, just because they “have a guy.” Perhaps the nine justices in the “highest court in the land” should grip their gavels a little tighter and use them with a little more consistency.

Later on, the same day as I read about the murder of Reiner, there was a social media follow-up post stating that Mr. Reiner and his wife passed away because of the anger Reiner caused so many others “through his massive, unyielding, and incurable affliction with a mind crippling disease” of not being in agreement with some of the actions and policies of some elected officials.

We can ask all kinds of questions in these senseless acts of violence and killing situations, starting with, if the person or group of persons were a child, or children, of the shooter or stabber, or were a brother, sister, or parent of the shooter or robber, or were any other relative or friend of the shooter or stabber, would they still open fire or use that knife on them? (Sadly, sometimes the answer is yes.)

Reasons for killing, in my mind, [and I don’t believe there are but very, very few justifiable reasons for killing (war, self-defense, stopping someone from intentionally trying to kill another)] can’t include political affiliation, or disagreeing with someone’s ideology, or opinion. When tragedies like the murders (brutal or otherwise) of anyone happen, comments including the victim’s political affiliation, their advocacies, or what their philanthropic activities were/are, just as much as what was their hair, eye, or skin color, what religion they professed, their preferences of food, colors, sports teams, music, and/or life partners they have/had, cannot become justification of, or for, any act of violence or taking of life.

Chinese philosopher, Lao Tzu taught that, “A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.” Mark Twain was quoted as saying, “If you want to change the future, you must change what you are doing in the present.” Civil Rights activist and writer, James Baldwin, once said, “Not everything that is faced can be changed, but nothing can be changed until it is faced.” The words of these three may be able to have a great impact in the title of this narrative. To make a difference in what is happening in our country and world, it takes one person, the person looking in the mirror each morning, to decide to take the first step to ending this violent trend we are in today. It’s obvious that what is happening in the present is spreading like wildfire, so we need to deal with it now, and change it today, before we can expect our future to become any better. Bullying at any age is unacceptable. Calling people names, based on their beliefs, color, creed, preferences of any type, is not going to change anything if we don’t face what is happening in a compromising, respectful, non-violent manner now, and if that doesn’t change, the situations discussed here will never diminish. I often told this adage to my children, students, and athletes, and it seems to fit this piece today. “If it is to be, it is up to me.” If everyone decides to be the person taking the first step, and we all do it around the same time, then what might seem to have been an arduous, but definitely reachable journey of a thousand miles, might successfully reach the destination for which we started, or at least be one not as ugly as it seems to be right now.