CHAUTAUQUA–“Wine, Women, and Dementia” is an unusually catchy title for a film and an organization with an important mission.

But first a word about those behind the film from Wine, Women, and Dementia’s website.

Producer Beth Rigazio has been a respite caregiver for a friend’s father who has dementia, while co-producer Taki Oldham has extensive filmmaking experience.

As for director Kitty Norton, this is her first feature film. Until 2016, she was an assistant editor at NBC in Los Angeles and came to a crossroads that led her home to Portland, Ore., where she became caregiver for her mother.

While carrying out her caregiving duties, she wrote “Stumped Town Dementia,” a weblog–or “blog”–that “resonated deeply with readers around the world.”

With Norton’s caregiving duties having concluded, she seeks to continue “to honor this journey with her mother, to spread awareness of the caregiver side of the equation in dementia, and to celebrate family caregivers–to let them know they are not alone and that they are worthy of being seen and respected alongside their dementia person on this difficult road to the end of life.”

Amen to that. Again, again, and again.

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In promoting the cause, Rosanne Corcoran adds that no one understands caregiving until having done it. Some think, “Well, you’re taking care of your mother. How hard is that?”

Along that line, some people think of full-time caregivers as retired, or think that–for them–cocktail hour begins every day at 3 p.m.

Think again. Caregivers are on call and can be on duty 24 hours a day, seven days a week, 365 days a year.

And then there’s the financial cost of caregiving to caregivers themselves, which the website notes is enormous.

Especially when caregivers aren’t paid, have given up their paying jobs, or both.

Given all of this, Wine, Women, and Dementia seeks “to decrease caregiver isolation, destigmatize the dementia journey, build caregiver connections, and celebrate family caregivers.”

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Wine, Women, and Dementia was the focus of a Chautauqua Women’s Club program on July 21.

Of course, caregiving isn’t undertaken only by women, nor is it only for people with dementia.

The challenges facing those who benefit from assistance may be cognitive or physical. Although cognitive challenges can include dementia, cognitive challenges aren’t limited to dementia.

For caregivers, their duties in one limited sense become less difficult over time. That is, they become less difficult with experience. Please notice, though, that the phrase is “less difficult,” not “easier.” Little about caregiving is easy. Much less does it become easier.

Indeed, on balance over time, the duties may well become more difficult, because the care one provides both increases and diversifies.

Along that line, one local doctor cites the importance of three things beginning with the same letter: Meals, Move, and Meds. In other words, recipients of care need to eat well, exercise as they can to keep strength up, and take what they should take.

Related to that is the importance drinking as much water as one needs. That’s needs, not wants.

For those with mobility issues, getting to the bathroom can understandably be taxing. Yet cutting down on consumption of liquids to cut how frequently one must get to the bathroom just creates other issues.

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While it’s tempting to think of caregiving as something that only older people may need, it’s not only older people who may need it.

Some people need assistance beginning early in life. Some of them are born with the need. Others come upon the need. Those who think their lives can’t change on a moment’s notice should rest assured that they can. Tomorrow, next week, next month, next year, and next decade are promised to no one.

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Norton presents her case in a compelling way. During the Chautauqua Women’s Club program, this columnist engaged her in a brief dialog. Part of it went like this.

He: “Is being a caregiver the hardest job you’ve ever had?”

She: “Yes.”

He: “Is that a close call?”

She: “No.”

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Hilary and Randy Elf have both been caregivers. He used to say that being a teacher was the hardest job he had ever had, but being a caregiver is harder.

COPYRIGHT (c) 2024 BY RANDY ELF