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Give Us This Day Our Daily Bread

Dear Richard and I have always been content with that fourth petition in the Lord’s Prayer. Until Oct. 1.

On the last day of September, we made a difficult decision. We would not eat bread for a month and see if it helped reduce our ever-expanding waistlines.

The conversation began as we were chatting about meal planning. Richard is easy about food. He will eat whatever I put in front of him. When I make something he hasn’t eaten before, he responds mostly with gusto. Mostly. He just likes to eat.

I told him about my friend, John, who lost 20 pounds in one month by giving up only bread. Richard laughed. “No way! Just giving up bread? That’s easy.”

I told him that John is a visible person who has to eat out often, including a lot of banquets. John said, “I was not going to be tracking calories or carbohydrates with my crazy schedule. I needed something simple, so I gave up bread for a month.” He said it WAS easy.

As Richard and I talked about it, we realized that only a month wouldn’t be awful. But then I added, if we go right back to eating bread and all its chubby relatives, we’ll put it right back on. We knew this might be a challenge for our foreseeable future – which at our age isn’t all that foreseeable.

Removing bread from our everyday eating is trickier than we thought. No English muffins, bagels, or toast for breakfast. Or pancakes, French toast, or waffles. No sandwiches for lunch. No rolls at dinner. All those seemed pretty obvious. Then we discovered that hot dogs come in rolls. Oops. And hamburgers in buns. OK, we got it. But we are committed.

Then real-life kicked in. On eating-out occasions, we have ordered salad, pushing the croutons aside. I was served quiche at a luncheon and left the entire pie shell behind. And no crackers with our cheese. OK! This really could be a lifestyle. I can do this!

Eventually, I was confronted with cake. That “no thank you” wasn’t too difficult. But cookies? Arrgghh! I do like to bake cookies. But then I thought I can get through October without making a batch. In the future, maybe I could eat only one before giving them away. Everyone knows that the baker must eat that one cookie necessary for Quality Control. Or two small ones.

Leaving the house presented a few more challenges. Yes, intellectually I know that it’s possible to drive past Tim Hortons and Dunkin’ without the car turning into their drive-thru lanes. And Richard and I had already decided no breakfast sandwiches. Yet, every time I drive by their storefronts, I hear this siren song calling my name, “Apple fritters, Marcy. Boston cream pie doughnuts. A-a-a-a-apple fritters.” I’m surprised that no one else hears it. Just writing about this, my mouth is watering. But it’s Oct. 15, halfway through No Bread month, and I have stubbornly driven past both stores.

I don’t dare test myself on the greatest challenge of all: keeping the car on Foote Avenue in Jamestown without turning into the Eklof’s parking lot.

I lived here for two or three years before being told about Ecklof’s, the Swedish bakery. Be still my heart! A pastry emporium only 15 miles away? In the last 40 years, I have actually visited Jamestown without indulging in their cinnamon raisin Danish with maple icing. At least twice.

Eventually, realizing I did not possess the willpower to drive on Foote Avenue, I began taking the back roads to Wegman’s and Home Depot to avoid the Eklof’s end of town completely. Now, I indulge only once or twice a year, but I am not driving to Jamestown this month.

So now it’s late afternoon and Richard has just asked what we’re having for dinner. I looked up and teasingly said, “You know what sounds good? A pizza!” He looked at me, grimaced, then laughed. “You’re right – that does sound good. But what are we really having?” After two weeks of baked fish, chicken, and a few chops, we’re having ground beef.

Now this man loves his hamburgers. He would eat them 5 nights a week. When I said beef, he thought of a cheeseburger on a bun, with tomato, onion, and of course, mayo. But tonight, his burger is going to be grilled with a gourmet infusion of onion and Worcestershire, a chef’s salad and a small serving of oven-roasted carrots. No bread.

Today we are at the halfway point. Richard has lost over 9 pounds and I have lost 8. And it really hasn’t been torturous. We haven’t had any pasta, although we might indulge one small supper. We have eaten potatoes twice and rice once. But we’ve been unwavering on the bread. I’ll update after Halloween.

So Lord, about that daily bread? Please divide the loaves from the fishes and just pass the haddock, OK?

Frankly, I’m dreading Thanksgiving. Pumpkin pie without crust is just pudding. OK. But turkey day without stuffing? Fuggedaboudit. I think that’s against the law.

Marcy O’Brien writes from Warren, Pa.

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