At a recent doctor’s appointment, I was asked to complete a questionnaire including questions regarding my physical health and mental state of mind. One question asked if/how often I’ve felt I wish I could’ve done more for my family, my children. This was probably the easiest question to answer, as almost every day, I wish I could do/have done more for Sally in our years together, and my children as they were growing up, now, and after I leave this earth. This isn’t an obsession, mind you, I just wish I could’ve done more for them, given more to them, made their lives a little easier along the way.

An offshoot to this question asked by me, to me, many times in my daily routine, is did I do everything I could in my roles as husband, father, son, sibling, cousin, uncle, grandfather, friend, and colleague? Did I do as much as I could do as a teacher, coach, a mentor? What exactly will my legacy be? I think we all ask ourselves, and maybe others, that question frequently as we get older.

I asked Sally this question recently, and she graciously said I’ll be remembered as a good teacher, coach, father, and husband, and I appreciated her kind assessment of my years on this earth. But I still wonder if I really did all I could do in my roles of this life. As I ponder this question, I don’t think I’ll ever accept yes as the answer to that question. I think if I say, “yes,” to that question, I’ll be satisfied and stop trying to get better, or expect my children and grandchildren to do everything they can possibly do to be the best that they can be every day of their lives.

There were some quotes I often used in parenting, teaching, and coaching, that many have said they remember years after we spent time together at home, in the classroom, and/or in the sporting arena. One is “Good is the enemy of Best.” Another is “Good, Better, Best, never should you rest, until your Good becomes your Better, and your Better is your Best.”

I don’t ever want to say, while I’m alive, that I did everything I could do to be my best. If I do, I’ll have settled for good, and “Good is the enemy of Best.” I don’t think I’d mind, though, part of my legacy to include that I did live life trying to do everything I could to be my best.

In every waking moment, there’s a chance to get better. We can get better at whatever we do in our jobs, be they part time, or fulltime, situations. We can always get better as a friend, neighbor, a family member (any type of relative), and most of all, as a person.

It took me many years to grow up, quiet down, to stop being a jerk, (though some might think I still have a way to go in all those areas. I think they might be right.) But I’ll strive to be better tomorrow. I’ve made that my goal at this stage of my life, to try and get better every day. There are days I succeed at that, there are days I don’t, but I have to make keep trying as a daily goal. If it happens I do succeed, I won’t completely accept it. Then, I can set my plan for the next day. If I don’t succeed, I have my plan for the next day. Success is not the accomplishment itself. Success is in the trying, the effort, the planning the strategy to be the best you can be. It’s in the drive, determination, the pursuit of accomplishment. Another quote I picked up at a coaches’ clinic, one I often used in many situations I was in was, “Failing is not the worst thing. The worst thing is failing to try.”

We’ll never be perfect, but we should never give up trying to be perfect. It’s all about the trying. “Strive for perfection to reach excellence.” Let’s let that be part of all of our legacies.