Taken from his popular song, The Gambler, Kenny Rogers offered some very sound and sage advice when he sang the lyrics,

“You’ve got to know when to hold ’em, know when to fold ’em

Know when to walk away, and know when to run,

You never count your money, when you’re sittin’ at the table

There’ll be time enough for countin’, when the dealin’s done.”

People might often add a number of different hats to wear above and beyond their jobs in their life. Some people become involved with community groups, maybe as a sports coach or official, maybe as a scout leader, maybe teaching an evening art or music class. Some people might be a volunteer at the Fenton Museum, the Robert H. Jackson Center, the Roger Tory Peterson Institute, and/or maybe the Reg Lenna Center for the Arts.

Some people might volunteer at the Chautauqua Sports’ Hall of Fame, the Lucy/Desi Museum, the National Comedy Center, or may be on the committee, or a volunteer, of the Babe Ruth World Series which comes to Jamestown every couple years.

Whatever people undertake, most do so because they may want to have pride in themselves, they may want to feel productive, they may want to they want to give of their time to fulfill their own lives, and/or they may want to help other people, adults and children alike. I mean, why would we want to work a job or career for anywhere from a quarter to a third (or more) of a century, if we weren’t doing something we enjoyed, or we weren’t passionate about it? Why, too, would we sign up to volunteer, or take on a project, if it wasn’t going to give us some enjoyment while we did it? And, why would someone want to take on coaching a team, or officiating a sport, knowing that you were going to be questioned on most moves and decisions, or almost all calls while you were doing it, if it wasn’t something you wanted to do, and enjoyed doing?

Unfortunately, there are some people who lose whatever good feelings they had for their job or volunteering opportunities way before they wanted that to happen. Sometimes, people don’t have a choice to move to another employment situation. People do have the opportunity to end any volunteering opportunity they undertake easier, though if they sign up to do something, they do need to consider their commitment in volunteering, and not leave someone else shorthanded.

In an episode of M*A*S*H*, with former NFL player, Alex Karras guest starring, he had a line that may be applicable in the context of this narrative. He was in the mess tent and there was no room for Hawkeye and Trapper to sit, and Karras’s character, a self-appointed body guard of Hawkeye, leaned over two members of the 4077 staff and asked if they were finished. Their response was, “No,” and Lyle, Karras’s character name, responded with, “You know, my mom always told me to leave the table a little hungry. That way you don’t feel so stuffed.”

I think that might have been the same message Kenny Rogers was delivering in his Gambler song, singing that we need to know when we’ve had enough and tell ourselves it might be time to move on. Some people might call that being a quitter, especially when we feel we’ve had enough when it stops being enjoyable. Some others may not feel that sentiment. Some may feel that the ‘flavor” of one thing is just no longer there, and they might want to “taste” something else while they still want to, and are able to, do so.

I am not speaking of breaking vows, contracts, or commitments. I’m talking about something you enjoyed doing, when you really didn’t have to do it, and it started to be more of a chore than something enjoyable, or you began to feel disrespected by many while you were doing it, and it just wasn’t as much fun as it was when you started.

People take on many interests while they are young. Included might be: school groups/clubs, Band, Orchestra, Chorus, Drama, Dance, community groups and/or teams, church groups or projects, extracurricular activities, or more. Some people find things they like, some they might not like (but at least they tried them). Some find they just don’t have enough time to do all with which they signed up, and rather than trying to too much mediocrely, they’d rather find some things they do really well, instead. This presents a life lesson, how to decide what activities to keep, and from what to walk away, in other words, which hand to play and which hand to fold.

In the many things I have been proud, and able, to do throughout my longevity on this earth, I always wanted to walk away from things while I still enjoyed what I was doing. I never wanted to be that person who, when something was over, knelt down, kissed the ground, and thanked the heavens because it was done. I always wanted to “Leave the table a little hungry. That way I wouldn’t feel so stuffed.” I wanted part of me to be a little bit sad when I walked away.

In most cases, I have been able to do that. There has been only one situation, which I am still doing, where I’ve regretted not stopping yet, this one for three reasons.

Reason one, I still have to do it for financial reasons.

Reason two, because there are some (not all) days it is still enjoyable.

Reason three, it gets me out of the house a few days a week, allowing me to stay active, and again, make a little money for some of our entertainment activities, and allow my rocking chair to rest a bit. (Besides that, getting out of the house some goes a long way to saving Sally’s sanity by not having me home going stir crazy and driving her crazy.) I dare say, though, that when I stop doing it, and it looks like it may be much sooner than later, in this case, I will be kissing the ground and talking to the heavens expressing my gratitude that it will be finally over.

So take a combined lesson from Kenny Rogers and Lance Corporal Lyle Wesson (Alex Karras’s M*A*S*H* character) and “know when to hold ’em, know when to fold ’em, know when to walk away, and know when to run,” and also to “Leave the table a little hungry. That way you won’t feel so stuffed.” And this way, you won’t have to feel frustrated anymore by what you’re doing, or too filled up to enjoy what you just ate, so to speak.

I have almost been able to leave all the tables of my life, so to speak, a little hungry, and that has been great. This last thing, I am stuffed to my ears, making me think long and hard about finally folding my hand, and walking away from the table.

Time will tell, I guess.